‘Twas The Day Before New Year’s (with profound apologies to Clement Moore)

happy-new-year-1379279192LAT

‘Twas the day before New Year’s, when all through the States,

Voters told liberals, “Let’s put on the brakes!”

Dumping nanny-state Dems with panache and great flair,

In hopes that St. Sanity soon will be there.

 

Pelosi and Reid tossed and turned in their beds,

While visions of Gruber still danced in their heads;

President O. grabbed his Ping, beat a Hawaiian retreat,

Did what he does best: bob and weave, two left feet.

 

When out in the polls there arose such a clatter,

Congress sprang from its sleep to see what was the matter.

Away to his district Kilmer flew like a flash,

Hang on to your wallets, better cough up your cash.

 

Then Murray and Cantwell and Inslee did show

That DemoLib bankruptcy soon we’d all know,

When, what to our wondering eyes should appear

But a November shellacking, let’s be of good cheer!

 

With brand new majorities lively and quick,

Let’s hope Rs remember who gave them their stick.

More rapid than Lerner or Holder they came

Get the country on track, let’s call some by name:

 

“Now, Gowdy! Now, Cruz! Now, Love, Lee, and King!

On Carson! On Kelly! Expose the left wing!

To the top of the caucus! Now take up the call!

Stand up to the DINOs! Stand bold and stand tall!”

 

Unilateral Barack made amnesty fly,

Enemies emboldened, slinks off with a sigh.

To the links he retires, dear Commander in Thief,

Clueless and craven, he thinks you’re his fief.

 

And then in New York, on the Big Apple’s roof,

The prancing and pawing of that de Blasio goof.

Open season on cops, what can turn Bill around?

Will he dump Reverend Al, get advice that is sound?

 

Dems dressed up in nothing, Woodrow Wilson retreads,

Emperor’s clothes are all tarnished with ashes and meds;

A bundle of bungling they fling from their backs,

Will voters remember in ‘16 attacks?

 

Here, the Vidette – it twinkles! It’s light and it’s airy!

‘Ben Bradlee’ is gone – is that sad or quite merry?

Bow-wows and bullies may insist it’s The Best,

Its ex-editor barks when put to the test.

 

Meanwhile out in Monte, Salzer’s still non-compliant

Refusing to budge, is she Chihuahua-reliant?

Public record requests offer insight and more

Into jaundiced reporting, who’s she covering for?

 

Here in Grays Harbor, Commish Herb has retired

Frank has to know now that his kingship’s expired.

Vickie joins Wes, fiscal conservs can take heart,

Single-party rule ended, may new jobs impart?

 

A new commish troupe – shall we unpop the cork?

Find common sense ground, will they cut through some pork?

And laying their fingers aside budget ties,

And giving a nod, can businesses thrive?

 

Cool heads to prevail, beyond DemoLib din,

Whose class-envy card has worn mighty thin.

Fiscal sense may arrive, ere they drive into sight,

Happy New Year to all, and to all a good night!

 

 

Photo credit: public domain

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